I need an ear to vent and ? to any mother-in-laws out there.....?

I'm sorry you're not getting the support you need and I hope you feel better soon. I'm not a MIL but I have one that also tries to play games. It's a shame your MIL feels she has to behave like that. Perhaps she thinks that you should be calling on your own mother for this kind of help? What does your husband feel about her lack of involvement with your children? Doesn't it upset him? It's a really difficult scenario because if you guys say anything she is going to be so delighted that it has upset you and empower her silly behaviour even more. If you feel something has to be said then it should probably come from your husband. But what to say depends on your family dynamic and his relationship with her. Is she equally indifferent to him? I know my SIL has always been the spoilt one in my husband's family and it has continued into adulthood. My MIL's favourite phrase is 'flesh of my flesh'. I never give her a negative reaction to this but remind her that I also have a mother so understand how special a mother and daughter relationship is. Lol. I hope your situation improves honey. You have my virtual support x.